Family Fun Facts

For Nona Pa and Uncle Adam 

It all started the other day as my father and I were sitting on the terrace.  I was asking if my mother's father had small eyes.  I was asking to explain the Asian look that my sister, my mom, and my Uncle Adam has/d—their eyes are tiny and squinty, different from my own, which are big and almondy.  I have my Nona Pa's sisters eyes—my dad's side.

"Well, Mom and Uncle Adam both have Caterpillar eyebrows," I said.
"And the other side is half-brows," my father said.
And I started to laugh.
The story goes thusly:
My Nona Pa was a Beauty School Dropout, but while she was still attending the establishment she decided to craft her own statement on shaping eyebrows; she decided to saw them in half.  And women went for it!  Soon the whole group of ladies in her class were walking around with half-brows.  I think she got booted out after that, but that is just the way I would like to finish the tale.  It makes her a tad more badass.
To this day my dad swears that this is the reason for me and him not having eyebrows.  He claims that Nona Pa's brows never grew back.  But both Dad's brother and my sister escaped the half-brow catastrophe.  So now the curse of the half-brows skips a generation, reworking the plague to that of the second born (it'll hurt a little less).

Keep watching the GameShow Network for the newest episode of Family Feud
"The Caterpillar Eyebrows vs. The Half-brows"

But at least we don't have brows that look like this: 

Now onto feet.  No, I am not one of those foot fetish freaks—no offense—but I came across this chart the other week. 

See, I have my father's feet.  I have Greek Feet! (which is funny because it is not even my dad who is Greek).   But I also have a Greek nose to match my Greek toes. 

Now to end things, for now, here is the Meyers' family song—"Hello from afar, Nona Pa!"